When I found this forum I asked for advice on how to go about forcing the issue to place my mother in a rehab/nursing home facility if she continued to be resistant. It doesn't matter anymore, my mother took a turn for the worse and I received a call yesterday morning about the new issue. The doctor explained that my mom's hemoglobin had dropped to 5.4 and they wanted permission to give her blood. He also indicated that they wanted to do a ct scan and ultrasound of her abdominal area, specifically her kidneys. This morning they called me to tell me they had discovered a bleed in the back of her abdominal cavity. Her hemoglobin had also dropped again, losing close to the total volume (2 units) she had been given yesterday morning. The only way to pinpoint and repair the bleed was to do a 2nd ct scan but with contrast dye this time and do a surgical procedure similar to a heart catherization. Her creatinine was at 2.4 which indicated she was already near the borderline of complete renal failure. If the dye were used, it would completely destroy her kidneys necessitating lifetime dialysis. She is firmly against dialysis as is the rest of the family. The only other surgical option was for an exploratory type surgery to find the bleed. However it would take several hours and she is not strong enough. Therefore having that knowledge I did agree for her to have another transfusion (1 unit) to give me time to talk with my family. As of 10:30 am, my mother is now on end of life, comfort care. She will not receive any more transfusions, some of her medications will be taken away. They cannot do any treatments for the express purpose of prolonging her life and they cannot take any heroic measures to save her life. The conference call making these decisions was in her room, I did talk to her for a few minutes. She knows, she understands and I heard acceptance in her voice. Now I just need to find the strength and make peace with my decision and to accept it myself and maybe, hopefully help my family to find peace and acceptance as well. They are attempting with my mom's agreement to place her in the facility of our choice to complete her journey.